New Bride Questions Husband’s Desire for Solo African Safari

A newly married woman, aged 69, has voiced her concerns over her husband’s desire to embark on an African safari with his adult son, raising questions about their relationship dynamics. The woman, who previously endured a 43-year marriage as a widow, expressed her feelings of hurt and confusion regarding her husband’s wish to travel without her.

In a recent column by advice columnist Eric Thomas, the woman, who signed her letter as “Left at Home,” detailed how her husband had not mentioned any plans for such a trip prior to their marriage. Now, just over a year into their relationship, the topic has resurfaced frequently, leaving her feeling excluded and upset. She stated, “I do not understand it — this wanting to be away from me for that long.”

According to Thomas, it is crucial to approach this situation from the perspective of the husband. Recently retired, he now has the opportunity to pursue long-held dreams, such as this once-in-a-lifetime safari. The trip represents a chance for him to bond with his son, who has struggled with anxiety and rarely visits. This newfound opportunity for adventure is significant for both father and son, as their time together is limited.

Thomas emphasized that it is essential for the wife to support her husband’s desire to travel. “It is unfair to hold this trip against him,” he wrote, suggesting that she celebrate her husband’s journey rather than perceive it as a slight against their marriage. He encouraged her to focus on her own interests and pursuits while he is away, stating that this experience should not be seen as abandonment but rather as a healthy way to maintain individual identities within their partnership.

Transitioning into a new relationship after a long marriage can be challenging. Thomas reminded “Left at Home” that both partners need to navigate their new lives together while also honoring their independent aspirations. By exploring their separate interests, they can return to each other with fresh stories and experiences to share.

As couples redefine their relationships later in life, understanding and support become key components. The wife is encouraged to embrace this opportunity for her husband and to seek personal fulfillment during his time away. Ultimately, fostering a balance between togetherness and individuality is crucial for the health of their marriage moving forward.

For those seeking advice, Thomas invites readers to send their questions to his email or through traditional mail in Philadelphia, PA.